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Love , Life and Struggle

When I say I love you. You say you don't deserve it. When I say I need you . You say I deserve someone better, When I say my life is better with you. You say I don't know any better. But when I kiss you, you say I love you, When I have to go, you say I need you.......

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

14-hr power cuts didn't dim Govind's IAS dream

ON the pot-holed lanes of India’s holy city Varanasi, Narayan Jaiswal used to pedal his rickety rickshaw to make a living and send his children to school in nearby Usmanpura. Sadly, even his meagre means came to a grinding halt when a wound on his foot grew sceptic. Ailing, and with no other source of income, Jaiswal sold off his small plot of land to finance his son’s dream.

His son Govind was fighting a parallel battle. Day in and day out the deafening noise of power looms, factory machines and generators around the 12x8 feet rented room shared by his father, mother and two sisters made life unbearable. All the cooking, washing, bathing to studying took place in the dingy room. To add to the misery the scarce power supply extended to almost 14 hours a day. He grew up with cruel taunts from the neighbourhood kids who mocked him for his devotion to studies. But his determination saw him through. “It was impossible to divert me. My family was the saving grace. If someone demoralized me, I used to just picture my struggling family.”

Today, Govind Jaiswal is an IAS officer, brimming with confidence. Surprisingly, he doesn’t quibble over any inadequacies.  “I thank my tough days. Life has no worth without struggle. It made me grow and smell the real world.” Govind credits his success to his dad and his sisters, especially the elder one who gave up her studies to look after them when his mother died.

Being aloof paid off
He managed to focus on studies in the hustle and bustle of kids playing just outside his room. What was the trick? He chose to remain quiet, least interacted with kids and adults. He laughs, “I was secretive. They mistook me for being a shy guy. In reality, I am an outspoken person.”

Ask this chatty boy the cause of his self-control, he shares, “I was cautious of every act. I restrained myself getting carried away in momentary fun. I didn’t allow anyone to intrude my privacy.” Up to class 12, he was seen immersed in books. “I used to read a bunch of comic, history books. Gradually I shifted the focus to ideological books.”

Managing studies amidst chaos
At sunrise, the factories in the vicinity burst into activity, making deafening noise throughout day and night. It was natural for anyone to lose concentration during exams. Interestingly, he remained a topper in school because of his well planned study schedule. “I used to finish subjects which required a lot of contemplation by December-January and I used to solve objective papers (Maths) in February.”

Ask him about the daily study routine and he responds, “During noisy morning hours, I sat on the staircase practising Maths. Since it’s a practical subject, we can bear all chaos around,” he says with a smile. As the sound simmers down in the evening, he focussed on the other subjects, Science, History and English.

How did he access books?
He was only in Class 8 when he ventured into the business of tuitions. Maths was a breeze for him. By the time he was in 11, students from Class 8, 9, 10 and even MBA aspirants among others flocked his room for Maths coaching. The income came handy as his father’s earning was too meagre and he had to support his two sisters as well. “I used to earn about Rs. 1000 per month. It helped me pay fee and buy books.” A modest fee of Rs. 10 in Banaras Hindu University (BHU) aided him easily to acquire his degree. “I strongly feel if you can show that you have the potential to prove then the world will come to help,” he says. Indeed, his aggressive attitude to achieve was lauded by all.

The IAS journey
Many suggested him to do engineering after graduation. He once gave it a thought but put it off as he could not afford to buy an application form costing Rs. 500. The other option remained IAS, which was a pauper’s friend.

The real struggle happened when he enrolled for IAS coaching - his dad’s condition had worsened and he had stopped pedalling his rickshaw. It was an emotionally shattering phase – but Govind managed to pull through. There was no other option, but to move to Delhi for IAS coaching. His struggling father sold the only remaining plot of land for Rs. 30,000 for his expenses in the new city. For IAS Mains, he dropped Maths as an optional paper for Philosophy and History. He read them from scratch to understand the basic nuances. “No subject on the earth is tough. You should have the will power to crack it. ”

Strategic study plan
His academic journey shows one has to have passion and time management skills to be a winner. He used to re-read and internalise the respective subjects. “I used to shut my book and contemplate over an historical event or a theory. I loved testing my memory. It’s important to be honest about what you study.” He chose one good reference book instead of depending on ten books on the same subject.

Was language a barrier?
“The problem is not language, it is confidence. My ability to read and express in Hindi made me an achiever. If you are confident enough to articulate your thoughts, then no one can hinder your success. No language is superior or inferior. It’s an unwanted perception made by the society. Learning languages is not a big deal – have faith in yourself. Earlier I only knew Hindi, I developed a grip on English at the IAS Academy. Our world is horizontal – it is the people’s perception that makes it vertical where they place some people as superior and others as inferior.”

Saturday, January 5, 2013

पति-पत्नी का भेद

एक पति पत्नी जब शादी के रिश्ते में बंधते हैं तो उनके पास कई बंदिशे होती हैं जिनसे उन्हें पार पाना होता है. आज आए दिन पतियों द्वारा पत्नियों को जलाए जाने की खबरों से दुखी होकर मैंने एक ऐसी हास्य कविता का चयन किया है जो हमारे सिस्टम पर मार्मिक मार करती है. आप भी आनंद लें इस हास्य कविता का और बताएं कैसी लगी यह हास्यकविता.



पति-पत्नी का भेद: हिन्दी हास्य कविता

सारी रात प्रियतम हमरे ,

दिल लगाकर पीटे हमको ,

फर्श पोंछने का दिल होगा ,

चोटी पकड़ घसीटे हमको ,

गला दबाया प्यार से इतने ,

अँखियाँ जइसे लटक गयीं हो ,

गाली इतनी मीठी बांचे ,

शक्कर सुनकर झटक गयी हो ,

पिस्तौल दिखा रिकवेस्ट किये ,

हम और किसी को न बतलायें ,

हम मन में ये फरियाद किये ,

ये प्यार वो फिर से न दिखलायें | |





वो तो अपनी सारी चाहत ,

सिर्फ हमीं पर बरसाते थे ,

चाय से ले कर खाने तक की ,

तारीफें  मुक्कों से कर जाते थे ,

रोज रात को शयन कक्ष में ,

सुरपान नियम से करते थे ,

फिर देवतुल्य अपनी शक्ति का ,

हमें प्रदर्शन करते थे ,

कसम से इतने वीर थे वो कि ,

हम तुमको क्या-क्या बतलायें ,

बस मन में ये फरियाद किये ,

ये प्यार वो फिर से न दिखलायें | |





हम ही ससुरी पगली थीं ,

जो प्यार से उनके ऊब गयी थीं ,

उनके कोमल झापड़ की ,

उन झंकारों में डूब गयीं थीं ,

एक रोज हम दीवानी ने भी ,

अपना स्नेह ; उन पर लुटा दिया ,

उनके प्यारे मुक्के के बदले ,

उनको भी झापड़ जमा दिया ,



अब इतना सज्जन मानव आखिर ,

ये कैसे स्वीकार करे ,

उसके निस्वार्थ प्यार के बदले ,

पत्नी भी उसको प्यार करे ,

बस ठान लिया उसने मन में ,

हमको सर्वोच्च प्रेम-सुख देगा ,

हम मृत्यु-लोक(पृथ्वी) में भटक रही थीं ,



हमको परम मोक्ष वो देगा ,



गंगाजल का लिया कनस्तर ,

फिर हम पर बौछार कराई ,

गंगा इतनी मलिन थीं हमको ,

केरोसीन की खुशबू आई ,

फिर अंततयः उस पाक ह्रदय ने ,

शुद्ध अग्नि में हमें तपाया ,

हमरी अशुद्ध देह जलाकर ,



सोने जैसा खरा बनाया ,



अब भी जाने कितने दानव ,

पति-परमेश्वर कहलाते हैं ,

हम भी शक्ति-स्वरूपा हैं ,

ये जाने क्यूँ भुल जाते हैं ,



पति भी तो अर्द्धांग है अपना ,

फिर , उसको क्यूँ ईश्वर कहते हैं ,

वो अपना पालनहार नहीं है ,

फिर , चुप रहकर क्यूँ सब सहते हैं ,

वो सुबह न जाने कब होगी ,



जब नारी स्वतंत्र हो पाएगी ,

भेद मिटेगा पति-पत्नी का ,

और प्यार से न घबराएगी |

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Thinking hard about life

Here i am sitting in my office @ evening Thinking hard about life
How it changed from a maverick collage life to strict professional life…

How tiny pocket money changed to huge monthly paychecks
but then why it gives less happiness.

How a few local denim jeans changed to new branded wardrobe
but then why there are less people to use them

How a single plate of samosa changed to a full Pizza or burger
but then why there is less hunger..

Here i am sitting in my office @ evening Thinking hard about life
How it changed..

How a bike always in reserve changed to bike always on
but then why there are less places to go on

How a small coffee shop changed to cafe coffee day
but then why its feels like shop is far away..

How a limited prepaid card changed to postpaid package
but then why there are less calls & more messages

Here i am sitting in my office @ evening Thinking hard about life
How it changed…

How a general class journey changed to Flight journey
but then why there are less vacations for enjoyment…

How a old assembled desktop changed to new branded laptop
but then why there is less time to put it on…

How a small bunch of friends changed to office mate
but then why we always feel lonely n miss those college frnz..

Here i am sitting in my office @ evening Thinking hard about life
How it changed.. How it changed..

Friday, January 20, 2012

Women Jokes

How Men And Women Change Oil
Women: Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3000 since...


Why Coffee Is Better Than Women
You don’t have to put cream in your coffee to make it taste good.


Women's T-Shirt Sayings
Don't piss me off! I'm running out of places to hide the bodies.


Good Girls Vs Bad Girls
Good girls say "thanks for a wonderful dinner"... Bad girls say, "what’s for breakfast?"


Understanding Women
At long last... The Men’s Guide to what a woman really means when she says something.

How to Impress a Girl

Talking to a girl and impressing a girl are two different things, because it takes charm, wit and good old-fashioned chivalry to impress a girl. If you are asking how to impress a girl, you have already taken the first step of making the effort. You need invest three things to impress a girl: body, mind and spirit. It sounds very spiritual but it is not, it's quite simple. You dress up nice, you give her honest compliments and you behave properly in front of her and her friends.

How to make a girl like you is not a difficult question as long as you have your basics right and know a few good pick up lines. Girls like to be treated with respect, they not only want you to be respectful to them but also to people around them. They need attention and they will be impressed if you notice the small subtle changes they do in their make up. Chivalry is still alive and well, open the door for them, offer assistance whenever you can and do not use curse words when they are around.

Ways to Impress a Girl
There are many guys out there who would like to know how to impress a girl and most of them think that there is some trick or one special thing that can be done to impress any girl. On the contrary it is a combination of things that you will need to do to impress a girl. Here are a few suggestions on how to get a girl to like you.

Dress Well
An important dating tip for men is women obsesses over what to wear and what to buy to wear all the time, so obviously they pay attention to what you wear. Now the question arises how to dress to impress a girl, well look around observe what other guys are wearing who have chicks swarming around them. Get some fashion tips from your other female friends or your friends girlfriends.

Good Hygiene
It is a male shower room myth that girls like a man who sweats, sweating on a sporting field is very different from smelling of sweat on a date. If you really want to know how to attract a girl, use a good long-lasting perfume and make sure you smell great, appeal to a girls sense of smell. It's not just your body odor, pay attention to your nails, hair and clothes and make sure everything is in order and gives an impression that you pay attention to your hygiene.

Attitude
Wondering how to get girls to like you? Confidence is the name of the game. Girls like a guy who can handle any situation and stay cool under stress. Be modest and do not brag about your achievements, remember it is uncool to trumpet your own horn. Be nice to people around you especially the waiters, parking attendants, etc. Having a good sense of humor will also stand you in good stead, girls like guys who can make them laugh.

Smooth Talk
When talking to a girl avoid the use of derogatory terms, although she might nod or put a smile on her face but inside she doesn't like you using abusive language towards anyone. A flirting tip, girls like honest compliments so don't hold back if you think she is looking pretty but be specific, for example tell her earrings look beautiful, compliment her choice of color for her new dress.

If you can play the guitar try some guitar songs to impress girls, they like to be serenaded. Last one on how to impress a girl, they like pleasant surprises, so surprise her with a small gift, take her to her favorite restaurant, or for a romantic movie.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

What is love?

What is love? It is one of the most challenging concerns for the human beings. Decades have handed down by, interactions have bloomed and so has really like. But no one can provide appropriate description of real love. To some Love is relationship set on fireplace for others Maybe really love is like success. You have to go all the way to discover it. No issue how you determine it or experience it, really like is the long lasting truth of the issue in the historical past of human beings. 

Love is patient, love is kind. It has no envy, nor it boasts itself and it is never proud. It rejoices over the evil and is the truth seeker. Love protects; preserves and hopes for the positive aspect of life. Always stand steadfast in love, not fall into it. It is like the dream of your matter of affection coming true.   heart: what is loveLove can occur between two or more individuals. It bonds them and connects them in a unified link of trust, intimacy and interdependence. It enhances the relationship and comforts the soul. Love should be experienced and not just felt. The depth of love can not be measured. Look at the relationship between a mother and a child. The mother loves the child unconditionally and it can not be measured at all.   A different dimension can be attained between any relationships with the magic of love. Love can be created. You just need to focus on the goodness of the other person. If this can be done easily, then you can also love easily. And remember we all have some positive aspect in us, no matter how bad our deeds maybe. And as God said Love all

Depending on context, love can be of different varieties. Romantic love is a deep, intense and unending. It shared on a very intimate and interpersonal and sexual relationship.  The term Platonic love, familial love and religious love are also matter of great affection. It is more of desire, preference and feelings. The meaning of love will change with each different relationship and depends more on its concept of depth, versatility, and complexity. But at times the very existence of love is questioned. Some say it is false and meaningless. It says that it never exist, because there has been many instances of hatred and brutality in relationships. The history of our world has witnessed many such events. There has been hatred between brothers, parents and children, sibling rivalry and spouses have failed each other. Friends have betrayed each other; the son has killed his parents for the throne, the count is endless. Even the modern generation is also facing with such dilemmas everyday. But love is not responsible for that. It is us, the people, who have forgotten the meaning of love and have undertaken such gruesome apathy.

In the past the study of philosophy and religion has done many speculations on the phenomenon of love. But love has always ruled, in music, poetry, paintings, sculptor and literature. Psychology has also done lot of dissection to the essence of love, just like what biology, anthropology and neuroscience has also done to it.

Psychology portrays love as a cognitive phenomenon with a social cause. It is said to have three components in the book of psychology: Intimacy, Commitment, and Passion. Also, in an ancient proverb love is defined as a high form of tolerance. And this view has been accepted and advocated by both philosophers and scholars.   Love also includes compatibility. But it is more of journey to the unknown when the concept of compatibility comes into picture. Maybe the person whom we see in front of us, may be least compatible than the person who is miles away. We might talk to each other and portray that we love each other, but practically we do not end up into any relationship. Also in compatibility, the key is to think about the long term successful relationship, not a short journey. We need to understand each other and must always remember that no body is perfect.

Be together, share your joy and sorrow, understand each other, provide space to each other, but always be there for each others need. And surely love will blossom to strengthen your relationship with your matter of affection.

Love Quotes

When I say I love you. You say you don't deserve it. When I say I need you . You say I deserve someone better, When I say my life is better with you. You say I don't know any better. But when I kiss you, you say I love you, When I have to go, you say I need you. When I am with you, you know, that there is no better feeling then our love coming together and that is something we both deserve.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I'll always remember... I'll never forget, how you took my breath away, the first time we met. No matter what happens... no matter what we do, I'll always remember the first time I saw you.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Love is not about finding the right person, but creating a right relationship. It's not about how much love you have in the beginning but how much love you build till the end.